Friday, August 27, 2010


Am I normal?
I get a headache every time my body over heats? Every time my body is above it's optimal temperature?

Friday, August 20, 2010


Death. Such a strong word. In fact, I don't think "strong" is even the right word to describe it. More like a "sad" or "depressing" word. Speaking of death, I wish I was (from my dad's side) besides both my grandma and grandpa's death time so I can see them alive for the last time. I don't regret it because there is nothing I could do about it. I was only a child/pre-teen when they died so I couldn't have afforded my own ticket over seas anyway. Although, I do wish that I could go to their funeral but that's not my decision. Yer, I admit, I miss them both. I was only able to see them once every two years and that's only if I go overseas.

* * * *

I remember being in the hospital my grandpa was in. Although, we were his "relative" us "grandchildren" was not allowed to go in and visit him and from memory, only my dad went in and I can understand why. After that... well... my memory fails me as I cannot remember what happened afterward. This only happened when I was still in primary school so I guess it's normal in a way... however, I do remember being back home... and received a phone call from a relative back "home" but I once again, have no memory of what they said. But I do remember, my dad was pretty pissed at that moment as he said he will sue that hospital for not taking care of a patient...I can understand why he was mad at that time...
The way my mum and dad described him...he sounded like a very strict and a bad father/grandfather. And I know I said I don't judge people...and considering that I only saw him like once or twice? I have to say, I didn't like him very much from what I heard. Although I dislike him very much, I still want to be by his side when he died, I still want to be by his death bed when it was time. I dislike him, but I still loved him, I still missed him, I still want to see him, get to know him more. He eventually passed away with an illness...
* * * *
How did my grandma died? Well...I'm guessing she died at the hospital too. Natural death or illness? At first I thought it was of natural death but now, I honestly don't know anymore. I saw her a couple more times then I did with my grandpa. She died sometime in March two years ago. 2007 Christmas/2008 Summer holidays were the last time I saw her when I was still over seas. I feel more sorry for my brother because he didn't come with us that time therefore, the last time he saw her was...more than 2 years ago (if that made any sense). We did not know this was coming so early. One minute, we were in the lounge room watching television and having a laugh. The next, we got a phone call from over seas saying she passed away. Once again, I was not by her side during her death time. And once again, I wished I was by her side when she died, by her death bed. Although, she seems like she did not have much memory of me, I still loved her and I missed seeing her. I knew her time was coming, just not that soon.

I don't know much about them. I don't have much memory about them yet I still missed and loved them both dearly and wished to see them again, get to know them more, but that's life and we have to move on no matter how hard it is... besides, I still have my grandparents from my mum's side and I see them quite often...and I'll cherish every moment I have with them and every time I see be honest, I am a lot closer to them then I was to my other grandparents from my dad's side.

* * * *

On Monday, August 23rd 2010 , something tragic happened. Yes, the word "Death" appears once again...
A bunch of tourists, mainly from Hong Kong was held hostage by an ex-Senior Inspector (with a M-16 assult rifle in hand) in the Philippians yesterday morning while on their way to Manila on a tour bus known as "
Hong Thai Travel". It seemed peaceful. The "attacker" posted several notes on the tour bus. One saying something like, "...You have made a big mistake..." another saying, "Big deal...3pm " and a couple more. Tourists were allow to lift the curtain and look outside. No body was killed yet. Then something happened and the attacker started going pyshco/mental. It was at night time, the tour bus started to move in attempt to escape but fail due to the police, shooting and flattening the front tires making it impossible for the attacker to escape. The police force/S.W.A.T team than started to surround the tour bus. They then tried 5 ways to get in but all attempt failed. They then found a back up/exit door towards the back of the bus after a good whole hour of trying to get in. During the operation, several gun shots was heard. A woman was clearly shown on the camera that she was shot dead by the attacker as well as some gun marks was also shown and we were able to locate where the woman was shot. Earlier on in the evening, a guy who was identified as the bus driver escaped through the window and ran for his life, ran to safety as fast as he can and reported that all, "...hostages are dead... ". According to the news, "Police said Mendoza (the attacker) was shot dead by a sniper after he used his captives as 'human shields' in the finale moments of the siege" The massacre finally ended at around 8:45ish pm in the evening.
-->* * * *
--> Above are the two links to the massacre if you want to know more information on it that is which I hardly doubt you will nor will you even find it interesting.

* * * *

This former police men was sacked for a crime he did not commit and in order to get his job back, he held poor innocent lives as hostages. Yeah, good job there Mr Mendoza, because what you were doing there is so gonna give you your job back. The funny thing was, when the bus driver escaped, he said all the people on board is dead but what do they find in the end? Some survivors. Yup I'm sure everyone but you are all dead and you must feel proud to be the only survivor. (There's that trust again. Did I mentioned anywhere that I don't believe in things unless I see them with my own eyes?). Another funny thing was the whole emergency exit door. That was an... two words, EPIC FAIL. The operation was also describe as, "...unimpressive..." One of the survivor said that he didn't want to kill anyone. That I believe. He released some people at least in return to have his job back. He released a diabetic man, 3 children and a guardian and 3 Filipinos. Normally, you wouldn't allow people to go to bathrooms. But this attacker, allowed 2 people to go to the bathrooms however, the police officers did not allow them to go back on once they were off that tour bus. Those who were released was sent back to the hotel. This shows that the attacker didn't mean any harm and only wanted his job back. I changed my mind, the attacker was a good man with a good heart. He only started shooting/killing people when he found out that his brother was being pushed (or perhaps arrested) into a police car. That was when he started to go mental and lose control of himself. Did I mentioned that he has a son and a brother who is also a police man? What will be my way of solving this situation? Agree to whatever he wants then once his off the bus and is "weaponless", quickly arrest him. What are my opinion? The S.W.A.T teams needs more training, the government needs to provide more supplies to the officers rather than just a jack-hammer or what ever they are called, they need to pull their act together more quickly, they need to be more prepare and have an actual plan. There are probably more that are yet to escape my mind.
What was meant to be a good and fun holiday turns into a deadly (with a very little chance of surviving) vacation.

* * * *

Sometimes, life is hard. There are no such thing as safety in this world. No country is safe. Peaceful, maybe. Safety = no.
Once again, life is full of unfairness. Earlier on tonight, I had a lot more to write...but now...I'm lost for words. They all seemed to just...disappeared and I can't remember some of the things I was going to write. Yer, I think I am lost for words. I'm also tired right now. So I think I'm going to stop writing...for now.

Friday, August 13, 2010


It was a shame that the other day, I had to teach my sister not to trust people 100%. As obvious, she's the kind of person who trust or believe in people 100%. It's weird because, seeing she is the older sister and I'm the youngest of the family, shes suppose to be the one teaching me this...
How did I learnt this? I honestly do not know or cannot remember. Guess I learnt that lesson or taught myself that while growing up.
Never ever trust people 100%. Even if they are a close friend, your best friend, someone you grew up with, someone you are in love with. Not even your family. In my own opinion, you can only trust people with 99.9%. So where's the other 0.1%? I think I should leave you to decide where that 0.1% trust should go.
It's funny how I said to never trust a person completely. You think I'm crazy right? Well I tell you what? I don't care if you do or not because it's my life and I get to decide what to do with it. So you can say all you want about me. I don't care. You can trust a person with 100% if you want. But to me, I can never do that, because, like I said earlier,
even if they are a close friend, your best friend, someone you grew up with, someone you are in love with, not even your family is trustworthy because there is always that o.1% chance that they will try to hurt you, turn against you, do things behind your back that you may not know. And when you find out about it, it's too late to fix it, it's too late to forgive them. But in my world, I'll stick to the saying, "Never Trust Anyone With Your Life but Yourself". And I will always stick to that saying. Enough said. If I continue any longer, I think I'm gonna repeat my self so I'm gonna stop writing right now, right here.

Saturday, August 7, 2010


From today, exactly a week ago...
On Tuesday, August 3rd 2010, a group of year 11, Politics and Law students went to the city and visited three different courts. Magistrate, District and Supreme Court. They were quite lucky on that day because there were "live" cases that was happening on that day, which also meant that they were able to see some "real live" action on that day as well. This was good as they were able to see what is really going on and what is really happening and how a court operates within an actual court. Too bad they didn't see any big cases. Too bad they didn't get to see the two lawyers argue like they do on television shows. Too bad they were only small cases. Some ancient stuff they saw in the Alexander Library was pretty amazing. One student in particular found it hard to believe that she was seeing stuff that had belonged in the past. The excursion finally came to an end with everyone going their own separate ways. I think it is safe to say that everyone (or at least me) had a good time :)

* * * *

On that day, I came home thinking, we were once young, so innocent, so happy being a child. We look as if, we will grow up to be a good person who will never commit a crime under any circumstances. So how does people go from innocent to evil? How can one commit a crime and go to jail? How can one commit a crime and not feel guilty after? How can one be so cold hearted? Have no feelings? The answer is very simple. One wrong choice/decision, one wrong turn and you will end up being in a dead end. Meaning, you will end up becoming a person you were not meant to be. A Devil. God didn't create us to commit a crime or become a devil. He created us to become a good human being. A better person. An Angel. Someone who can look after mother nature, the animals, the world, the earth, some one who can look after or take care of one another with love. He created us because he loves us. He created us because he has faith that we can change the world together as a whole. He created us so we can create world peace. Hence the saying, "Make Love, Not War". I guess one day, regardless of me being here, being able to see it or not, maybe one day, there will be "World Peace " and when that day comes... only God knows where I'll be and no matter how much I want to see that day come, only one person will forever be here to see that day come. That is God
And regardless of me being dead or alive, he will remain in my heart forever